All I know are two things: when I'm really happy I can't write, and when I'm really sad I can't write.
I'm writing now, so that's a good sign, I think.
Here is a writing exercise I learned from a writing teacher in order to break us out of a block. I can't remember who told this to me. (The irony is obvious.) Just write "I remember when....." and keep your fingers moving (pen or keyboard, you choose.) If you get stuck again, just stop your thought and start a new sentence with the same three words, "I remember when..." Don't edit, just go.
I remember when ......things were easy and chocolate didn't bother my stomach. My friend Sammy made a chocolate cake for me once when I was in the third grade. He brought it to my classroom in the afternoon as a surprise, but then he tripped and it flew over the teacher's desk and landed half on her desk and half on the floor. The whole class laughed at Sammy and I remember how we all ran to the front of the room and began licking frosting off of everything. Kids are gross.
I think our chests hold secrets. I wish I could break my chest open and have someone read all my secrets to me. I remember when my grandmother was alive. She taught me secrets about joy and about tenderness and I think she kept extra secrets in the fridge for when I was hungry.
I remember when I went blind in my left eye and how it was one of the most calm times of my life. I could still see out of my right eye and I looked at everything with awe and saw details inside small things like pencil points and raisins, and this reminds me that i should pay closer attention to my life. I remember when a man I loved told me he loved me back and meant it. I wish love didn't have to be sad. It seems like love should be something easy and special and I guess the world is filled with so many mixed messages that no one is willing to risk anything anymore. I remember a UFO I saw once, but no one believed me.
I believe (in) you.
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